Again?

So, I started my first day of RN school today. LPN school was hard enough so, we'll see. I am greatful to even be in the program; there were 80 students selected and 1200 applicants...

UPDATES

Lots going on since my last stupid post. Sorry bout leaving that there for so long.

Madeline started school at the beginning of the month and she absolutely loves it! She did not go back to the small private school she has been going to since she started school at age 5. As most of you all know, she has struggled academically. Especially, with her reading and math skills. Plus she has been receiving special services from the public school district including OT and PT. With her going into 3rd grade, I was worried that she needed more intense intervention and her father and I decided to place her in public school for the year where she would have more services readily available. So far, we are thrilled with that decision.

She was placed in a "non-graded" age/grade appropriate classroom that focuses intensely on reading and math. There are 8 3rd, 4th and 5th grade age students in her class as well as a special education teacher, a teachers aid and a one-on-one assistant. That is 3 full time staff in her class for 8 students and on top of that, she is getting OT, PT, and speech. She absolutely loves it and she comes home and does her homework willingly. she is already able to independently read at a first grade level. That is amazing.

Today she had to wear her bathing suit under her clothes because for the next two weeks she will be swimming for PE and APE (adaptive physical education). She is really excited about all the different things that she gets to do.

Oh, and just so no one misunderstands my position on the "school" issues... I still support Christian Education. Madeline just needed extra services that our small school was not able to provide right now.

And now, an update on... ME.

Andy and I are in the process of a divorce. It may seem sad, but really it is the best decision. Believe-you-me, it is not because we didn't try. We certainly did. It is a bit weird though because we are not fighting over anything and we still get along. This whole issue really deserves a post of its own so, I wont go into much detail.

I got a part time job doing local flu clinics for the next few months. On top of my other job, it is just one or two days a week in the afternoon/evenings and I signed up to do clinics that are local to us. It may even go into next year because the N1H1* is out this year too and that wont start for a few more weeks.

A year ago, I applied at the VA and they finally called me back. FINALLY!!!!! It is so hard to get in with them. The benifits are amazing and the $$ is much better then average salary in this area. The only problem is if I get/accept the position, then I am commiting to being a grown-up. Of course I will accept it if it is offered, it is just really scarry for me. Go figure.

Enough for now though. Maybe your comments will encourage me to post more and not be such a slacker in the blog world.

WHAT? HE DIED?

When I got up this morning, I turned on the news and found out that M*chael J*ackson died yesterday. I am SHOCKED! He has been one of those familiar voices you never think twice about not hearing live again. It is very disturbing to me.

When all of us kids were young we used to listen to him on the radio all summer long. It wasn't something our mother approved of but when she was at work we would turn on the radio and there he was. I remember calling the radio station on our Mother's 30th birthday and asked them to broadcast it on the air. Of course, we had to leave it on when she got home so she could hear them announce her birthday to everyone listening and in the mean time... There he was, singing away: Just C*all M*y Name and I*ll Be There. I thought for sure we were going to get in trouble or have to turn it off and not get to hear them say Happy Birthday. I guess it was good it was one of his more kosher songs cause we didn't have to turn it off.

I always loved it when Wierd Al sang his spoof songs too. Just Eat It was such a cool version of MJ's B*eat It.

As an adult, I never got excited about hearing him but his presence was more nestalgic then anything elce. It always took me back to those rebellious moments of the 80's. Eesh.

75th %

Madeline just had another Dr. visit. She has been such a peanut most of her life... UNTIL NOW! Since February, she has grown an entire inch and gained 8.5lbs. I didn't believe her when she said the new (to her) shorts that her auntie Rachael just sent her were too tight. Thankfully not all of them are but, surprisingly some of them were and they are a size 10. A SIZE 10!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LORI!

Happy Birthday lil sis! (I have to specify lil here cause Ryan left a comment on Natalie's blog about the 3 little girls and Lori.) I'm glad you were always older in a lot of ways cause think of all the things we would have missed out on if you hadn't skipped your Junior year in high school and graduated with me. I will always cherish that year that we were together. Having a sister like you was the next best thing to being a twin. Having a built in friend is priceless.

Remember being sent to the principles office for fighting over our babies. We had to carry around those dolls for mairrage and family (was it part of health or was it part of religion?) and our babies were identical cabbage patch dolls. You left yours in the trunk of the car and tried to steal mine which lead to a knock-out, drag-down fight during English class. Eeash! When we got into the principles office we started laughing while they got out the first aid kit and then we sang that song from the Barney sound trac You Are My Sister. Remember me begging you in class to help me with my homework assignment that was due and we were discussing it in "ARP"? Our teacher spoke "OP" but because it was the same idea, we were totally busted.

Oh, and getting our drivers license together. You passed your test first but generously let me get my lisence first so I could have mine before you. Nice job on your specialty: paralell parking. It must of been a good job afterall cause you passed!

Your are the best (18 whole months younger) sister I could have ever asked mom for. She sure did a good job filling my order. remember being really young and playing Debbie and Stacie? I forget who was who but we always ended up adopting babies that were left on the other side of our bedroom door and we would play House for three days in a row. I know we played alot with our 3 foot tall Kristy dolls that had really bad hair but we had little dolls too. It was so much fun.

Wish I could be there with you today. Have a fun day!
Love,
Shannon

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOB!

Happy Birthday to the best Step-Dad and Grandpa in the whole world! You are such a blessing to our family. I wish today wasn't so scattered with Mom being gone to Oklahoma right now for Grandma Annie. We will have to celebrate as soon as she comes home.

For now though: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Love,
Shannon and Madeline

CHARLIE: WITH THE DETAILS

WOW! Tomorrow sure did take forever; has it been 3 weeks already since I promised to post more tomorrow? Sorry about that.

So Charlie is a Labradoodle. The mother is 50% standard poodle and the father is 50% chocolate lab. And, is he ever adorable! He is right around 3 years old and weighs about 75lbs. Laying on the floor all stretched out, he is almost the same length as ms. Maddy Paige.

Madeline's school bus driver Cindy, (who has been transporting her back and forth for 2 years already) gave him to us. His name was Huggs when he came to live with us. Not keen of the name, we changed it. We asked her if she would be offended and she said it was fine with her.

Evidently, Cindy has 5 large breed dogs including Charlies' sister (a standard poodle). She recently had to downsize her living situation and could not keep all of them. Charlie is one of her favorites and she had not planned on parting with him but as fate would have it... An answer to prayer in more ways then one. Madeline was praying for another dog and Cindy was praying for help in deciding on what to do with her menagerie; a blessing all the way around. Cindy was able to find a good home for one of her dogs and we got an awesome pet. As a bonus, she gets to see him on school days too, because Charlie is outside in the mornings and in the afternoons waiting with or for Madeline. When Cindy opens the bus door, Charlie sometimes goes in and says hi to her (and everyone else on the bus). And the biggest bonus? He doesn't run out the door as soon as the opportunity is presented and he can be without a leash as long as I am out there with him.

OUR NEW DOG

So, here he is: Charlie, our newest family member. Adopted 3/29/09.

ITEM 86

Of course I graduated from Nursing School, but I still have to pass the NCLEX*. The official test date: March 19, 2009.

Preparing for the NCLEX*: an article I happened to read the day before I took my state Boards...

"Oh my, the computer didn't shut off after item 85-what will you do? The computer hasn't made a decision about your competency either way at this point. Therefore, you must continue your partnership with the computer. If the computer was sure that you weren't capable, it would have definitely shut off. Now all you have to do is prove on the next several items that you are capable of bearing the title. The average number of items on any candidates exam is about 110. Item 86 is your friend-do well."

THEN WHY DID MY COMPUTER SHUT OFF AT ITEM 85?!!!

Fortunately, it was on outdated article that I read and the official test gives a minimum of 85 questions. So, basically, this is what I went home with: Either I did really well and it only took 85 questions to know if I was competent enough or not... OR... I must be really stupid because the computer sees no hope of recovery, even by offering me 125 more questions. And, now I wait 48 hours to know.

I PASSED!!!!!!!!! I am an official Nurse! Whooh Hooooh!

(I know I waited a long time to take this darn test but I was REALLY scared).

COOPER

With sadness, I gave the consent for Cooper to be cremated this morning. Madeline and I were just leaving the house for church when the phone rang. Madeline answered and it was the Humane society calling. She was super excited to tell me who it was and that they probably found our dog. Well they did but it was not what we expected.

One year ago yesterday was the day we brought our fox hound home from the shelter. Madeline did not understand why he did not have a "birthday" so she planned to have a party for him on his one year anniversary date. (She has me read my sisters blog to her and when she realized what "Gotcha-Day" was, she decided that thats what we would celebrate in place of a birthday). Madeline was so excited. We went shopping the day before and she bought him presents, a meaty bone, and a boquet of balloons. Some of her friends from school even made cards for Cooper.

Well, somehow, while we were at the neighbors house, cooper escaped out of their fenced yard. We still cant figure out how, but he did. We went looking for him but without luck. The next morning (Gotcha-Day) I called the Humane society to see if he had been picked up and if not, to let them know we were missing our beloved dog.

Well, he made it to the one year mark. No party though. He was hit and killed by a car last night not even 1/2 mile from our house and we never even saw him. It breakes my heart because we loved him so much.

I had Madeline go to a friends house this morning so I could go identify him. I hope she handles this better them I am or I might have a major melt down. I'm sure going to miss him.

POT LUCK OF SORTS

Hard to believe it has been over 2 months since my last post.

Have you ever had so much time on your hands that you decide to do something that you have been putting off for good reasons? Well, let me just say, this is the reason I have avoided the whole blog thing... I am OVERWHELMED!! I decided to clean the basement and the garage out before starting a job.

Now... Road trip anyone? I could sure use the help. I have junk all over the house and now I am not sure where to go next.

The job search is going well. I'm pretty sure I will be accepting a job offer by next week. The best choice is the one where I would be "squeaked" in on the day-shift. How awesome is that; to get a job as a brand new nurse on days?

I just found out that the funding for my license should be available to me within the month. Hopefully, I will be able to take the boards by Thanksgiving.

Madeline is doing great is school this year. She brought her homework home last night and showed me her papers on the President. If she were the President, there would be NO WARS!
She still does PT and OT two times a week.

I took her in last week for her physical and my suspicions were confirmed about how much she has grown. She started school last year in the 25th % for her age; wearing a size 5-6 and a 12 shoe. Now, she is in the 50th % and wears an 8 with a size 1 shoe. No wonder I keep washing clean clothes. She tries to wear clothes that don't fit her. Instead of putting them away or telling me, she takes them off and they end up back in the laundry. Now that I know this, I am putting them aside so it doesn't keep happening.

Last week, we had one of the scariest storms I have ever been in and it went on the entire night. The wind was relentless. It was so bad I thought our roof was just going to lift right off and fly away. Around 11pm Madeline asked me if I had a sleeping bag. Since she has one too, we should get them out and sleep in the basement. Madeline has never even been in the basement because it is unfinished and she is scared of it. We ended up going downstairs to sleep on the couch bed and it was still pretty loud.

We tried to sleep... about 1 AM I called Karoline (her husband was working nights). Since she was awake (imaging that) I told her I was putting Madeline and Cooper in the car and if we were not there in less then 20 minutes... send out the troops looking. I look back and realize that was probably not the best idea, the winds were 55mph+. But, misery loves company. We were all scared together. On the way home the next morning, I noticed two of my neighbors will be getting new cars. Huge trees fell over the night and their cars were crushed.

Back to cleaning... I have got to get this house under control!

MY SIX

My sister Rachael posted today about a six word challenge: summerizing her life using only six words. After comming up with her six word summary, she then challenged other people who read her blog to come up with their own.

Here is Rachael's: "LIFE IMITATES ART: MINE IS FINGER-PAINTED"
(her blog can be found on my side line) Be sure to check it out as not to miss the meaning behind it.

When I read Rach's blog this morning I instantly thought of my life's motto. Longer then six words though. So, my life: Summerized in SIX.

"TAKING THE LONG ROUTE: NOT LOST!"

In more ways then one! I wrote one of my first posts on the original saying: "I don't get lost... I'm just taking the long route".

I often get grief from family and friends about the fact that I am directionally challenged. However, I'm not always sold on the label cause I usually always recognize something or have a general idea of where I am. It may take longer then usual, but I usually get there.

Now, go get your own SIX!

When I grow up...I think I will be Republican.

Democrat? Republican? Who knows? All I know right now is that all the important men in my life for the past 18 years are definately Republican; which made me think that I was too. Well, recently, a very good friend and I were talking about politics and I said I was Republican. Of course, because I wouldn't vote for Hillary or Obama in fear of being rejected by all the important men in my life (plus, the fact that I don't like what they are campaigning). So, I was shocked to hear Alysia tell me that I tended to live more of a Democratic lifestyle. Hu? Well, I do kinda like equality here, ya know. Does that make me a Democrat then? I think I need to be a grown-up before I vote. Honestly, I think I at least want to be Republican.

Yesterday, Madeline and I got to meet Senator Hillary R Clinton in town. She was a couple miles from the house at a local produce market. Evidently, a couple weeks ago, a local orchard crop was destroyed by a hail storm. I had no idea, even though I was home the day it supposedly happened. It didn't hail at my house.

Regardless of the fact that I wouldn't vote for her, I still thought it would be neat to see Hillary in person. Kudos to her for attempting a run in the Presidency. Too bad she has screwed up education so bad and was planning to mess up the health care system as well. Otherwise, I probably would have voted for her. I think it would be awesome to see a woman president.

Madeline was too cute about being there. She thought it was pretty cool that she might end up on the local news (we were front row, waiting on her to arrive). Oh, and Lori... I did some advertising for your family farm while we were there. I was wearing my C******* produce shirt because it was what I wore when we picked strawberries earlier in the morning. (The whole reason she was in town was because of farm issues). Not very many other people were dressed up so it wasn't like I stood out looking like a bum. I didn't even know about the visit until about an hour before.

For the record, since I'm not sure what party I belong to yet, I wont be voting out of loyalty. But just incase you're wondering... I'm not impressed by either.

TAGGED

I've been tagged by a couple of family members to share six quirky things about me. Hmm...

1) I'm a "patt patter". Ever since I can remember, I have always loved to pat the arm of, someone; I will do it as long as they will let me. My Grandma Annie has the BEST arm in the world. I am also known to pat with my foot on people's legs too. Natalie always let me do it but Lori usually put a stop to it right away. Even still, I have to put my hand on an arm or a foot on a leg when I sleep at night. Lucky for me, Andy and Madeline don't mind at all.

2) I am not a morning person. Even when I am on a schedule of waking before 9am, I look forward to sleeping in. All last month I had to be up by 5am and I dreaded it. Fortunately for me, Madeline is a sleeper too. She would naturally wake around 9 or 10am if I would let her. Works well for me when we don't have morning obligations. I think getting her on the bus by 7am is worse then not getting to sleep in though. That is a HUGE daily accomplishment. She is miserable even if she goes to bed at 7:30 the night before.

3) I am a messy house keeper. My floors are almost always swept and mopped and the bathroom is scrubbed once a week, but you wouldn't believe how messy things can get around here. I pile things a lot. Interestingly though, my piles are quite organized. I can tell you how far down in a pile something is, even if I haven't looked at it for a few days. For the record though, Andy likes to have more order then the average person so, for his sake, when I know he will be home for the weekend, I make huge efforts to declutter. When he is home on a more regular schedule, he is really good about helping. Of course, he does have his own room. It just makes since, seeing as he needs space that is just his, with no clutter. I never go in there, so there are no piles. It doesn't bother me one bit.

4) I love old men. They just make me smile. Even the grumpy ones. Very rarely will you catch me missing an opportunity to say Hi to strange old men. They are just so darn cute the way they walk real slow with a walker or all hunched over. I especially love to greet the ones with a scowl, because it is so easy to make them smile. Oh, and what about the ones that are just happy all the time... the ones that play the harmonica or sing with no inhibitions. I just love em.

5) I still use hot rollers in my hair. They are amazingly easy to use and I can get away with an extra day of not washing my hair by using them.

6) I am a hypochondriac... what nursing student isn't though. They other day we were learning about STIs (the new politically correct version of STDs). Anyway, it is a good thing I know that the little annoyances on the bottom of my feet are caused from stress. Otherwise, I would have imagined I was getting a false/positive reaction to syphilis and thought for sure that I had some rare auto immune disease that was silently killing me. Turns out, it's just eczema. Good thing I already knew that one. Ha! (Not quite as gross as it sounds...my feet)!

I would tag other people, but like my mother said... Everyone who reads my blog has already been tagged.

Just got back from visiting my Dad in Oklahoma.



Other then the nice greeting from Barbra, the visit was good. It went by very fast and I wish I had done a lot more then I did. The first day in town I went with my dad to put in some bids for his Rock company. When we were finished there, we stopped by the Preacher's Ranch and I got to meet him and talk to him about Uncle Charlie. Then, we stopped by the Lake house and I was able to see the devastating remains of what was lost in the fire. It was very sad. I think it was a really good day for my dad though because he was able to find closure on Charlie's death.














This is Dad burring Charlie's dog, Baby. We found him in the back of the house on the bed next to the window.

We did find out that the cause of the fire was because of a propane gas leak, between the wall, on the back side of the house. The leak had caused the wall to fill up with the gas and Charlie most likely was standing next to it when the fire ignited. It is believed that he was killed instantly.

A neighbor was outside when she noticed smoke coming from the trailer. She saw both vehicles were there and knew Charlie was home. She ran over and smashed all the windows out of the front of the house hoping to help him escape, but he did not answer her and she didn't dare go in. She said the house was completely destroyed in less then 5 minutes.





Not much left. Is there?


Dad said he is going to take the rock over to his house and build a sidewalk by his pool. I guess he is going to scrap as much metal as possible too. Not sure what is going to happen to the land. Probably nothing for now. It is still in Trust from Grandpa so I'm not sure anyone really knows. I've heard talk about it going to AireAnna. That makes the most since to me.




This is a top view. There is absolutely NOTHING left.
I cleaned out Charlie's truck and found a ton of important documents though. What was he thinking to keep all the property deeds, car titles to both cars, and a few other important documents in the glove box? I found them tucked in the back of his owner's manual. Hmm. Why there?
I also found his extra set of keys... hanging inside the door of his gas tank. It came in very handy to have them because Barbra sure did accidentally pick the originals up and take them to work with her. She called and told dad once she got to work because she didn't want me to drive it. She also said that the insurance company called her when they "heard" what had happened because she was listed as next of kin. Whatever! Evidently they needed to let her know that only her and dad were authorized to drive the vehicle. Have you ever heard of such craziness? She was pretty upset when she saw we had moved the truck (spare keys, remember?) and then I was sure to mention I had called my own insurance company and got permission to drive it. She was pretty upset that she didn't get her way. UGGH! She is so selfish and greedy.

With it being as late as it is, I am going to go ahead and publish this post. I will add more to it or just start another post in the near future. My Easter post should be up in a few days as well.

COOPER

I have been putting off this post since Wednesday because I can't figure out how get my pictures to the desk top from the camera.

We have a new dog in our family! His name is Cooper and until our vet check today, we thought he was some hound mix mutt.

About a month ago I talked to Andy about getting a dog. An older dog, because I'm not so sure I have the energy or desire, for a puppy. I just wanted to have a dog that wanted to be lazy, and love us. For a while there I thought I was going to have to check the weekly obituaries in hopes of finding a recently orphaned one.

Well, I found Cooper, formerly called Buddy but officially named Andy. Funny, isn't it? I didn't know the shelter had named him Andy until after I had dicided to consider him. When I called Andy and told him about the perfect dog he seemed sceptical that I could find a perfect one in such a short time. Maybe he thought I was settling, or something? Then I told him I knew it was the one because of his name.

Two weeks later I took Madeline to see this dog. They took to each other really well and Madeline, although reserved, was very excited that we might bring him home.

About another week and Andy called to tell me he thought I should go and get the dog. He wanted us to have him.

We went that day and instead of turning in the paperwork and planning on another visit, the dog somehow ended up in our car and was officially ours. We call him Cooper.

He is such a good boy. I have yet to hear him bark. No messes when I leave him home alone in the house and I even leave the garbage can in the kitchen. I called my mom and told her he was so good I thought maybe he might be sick. He sleeps the whole night on a rug next to Madeline's bed, lets her walk him without a fight and is really sweet.

Okay, so I took him for his first vet check today because I noticed he wasn't feeling good on Saturday. He wouldn't eat, he could barely get up the stairs and he caughed so hard I thought he had asthma.

At the vet, I found out that he has bronchitis. I also found out that he is a pure bread American walker foxhound. Who knew? I thought he was a beagle mix. Kinda weird to see a 64lb beagle. Hey, anything can happen whith dogs these days. He sure has the face and markings of one though.

So, now I have a dog that can run for hours without tiring. (Running buddy?) The internet said they were originally bred for running with horses while hunting.

Cooper definately belonged to someone who spent time working with him. He is about 5 years old. He must have wondered off on a scent during hunting season and his owner couldn't find him. Lucky us!

I hope to have pictures up soon. If you can't wait, just google "foxhound" and they should have a good picture there. Cooper is tricolored.

Is spell check working these days? It said I spelt everything correctly the first time through. hmmh.

This is for you, Uncle Charlie

I missed you before I got the call. When dad called me on Tuesday night and blurted the news that you were gone all I could think of was how thankful I was for the past few months between us. We had such a good time just talking about "stuff". Sometimes we would talk for so long that I wanted to keep it a secret from dad because I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I just had so much fun. Even through my tears as I write, I am able to spontaneously laugh about how hard we laughed a few weeks ago about *******. Silly, I know, but it was so incredibly funny.

Contrary to what some may have thought of you, I think you were an incredible man. I wish everyone knew the side of you that I did. You had incredible strength inside of you, both physically and mentally. Hey, not everyone gets to brag about the fact that their blood has the strength of an Olympic swimmer or the intelligence to speak 3 languages fluently. Didn't you swim next to Mark Spitz in the 70's? Actually, I know you did. What a privilege it must have been. Your knowledge of history is somehow more impressive then the BS you have in physics, but your ability to read others was a talent greater then your strength and knowledge combined.

You are my blood. You understood me. I was just telling you the other night how hard it is for me to no not self sabotage my efforts when I get so close to finishing something. I was being so hard on myself and you put me back into reality. You told me how important it is to not let my intelligence scare me. (Intelligence? what?). You actually know I know better. I am smart and I will finish school. It was encouraging to hear that I'm not alone on being scared of myself though. Oh how I wish you had understood yourself more before you got into so much trouble.

You always got me because we are so much alike. Rebels by nature and obsequious almost to a fault. You said you mother was that way too. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree after all. It is amazing how we are so much alike yet we are so incredibly different. You said it was because of how amazing my mother is and how she did so right by us. I couldn't agree more!

Remember telling me about how much fun it was when all of us would stay with you. You had to promise to have us dressed and at church on time but it wasn't too hard. You had Rachael there to help you. You were always impressed with how much of a leader she was; down to earth, smart as a whip, and such a good leader. You never doubted she would grow up to be anything other then a doctor. Ryan, such a good brother. He could take all of us girls down at once yet when we would gang up on him he wouldn't even flinch. You knew he was going to grow up to be such a good husband and father. It takes a real man to hold back his own strength. You loved his wife Lisa too. Always praising her for being such a good wife to your nephew. Lori, you always saw as responsible and practical. You said she was a good sister for me to have so close because she keeps me in check. (I definitely agree). No hard feelings at all when you say you always thought of Francie as the prettiest. You remembered her as always having the most adorable face and the happiest spirit. She was always smiling and clueless of anything less then positive. Finally, you mentioned how much you missed of Francie and Natalie because they were the youngest. You just loved how much fun Natalie was. You felt like a kid all over again every time you saw her. You two were so hilarious at the restaurant we went to in the city when we came through to visit. She still thinks of you as being such a FUN uncle.

Because I know that your time was limited with us, I wasn't as initially shocked as I thought I should be. I thought I would have had more of a warning. The first thing I said to my dad when he called was "Dad, at least he didn't die of AIDS". To most people, that may seem odd. If you were here, you would have been proud of me. We all knew you have been living with AIDS for a long time. The worst part of the whole disease is the fact that the people you meant the most to, would have to watch you die. You wouldn't give into the disease though. You had such a zest for life that even a disease as powerful as yours couldn't win. Your doctors were so impressed with you too. As tragic as your death was/is, I am grateful that you didn't have to loose the battle. Even in death, you survived.

I will miss you more then anyone can possibly understand. You have been a window into my heritage and the information that you have shared with me is a treasure.

Less then a week before you died we talked about life and death. You said God must have a good reason for you to still be here with us. It was then that I told you that God is so generous that He gives us the opportunity to decide whether we will accept His gift of eternal life. I said He must be waiting for an answer from you. I truely believe your decision was made before the 4 days later when you were killed. I trust God and know that He respects our decisions. He was waiting for you Uncle Charlie. That's why you were still alive.


*Charlie died on March 3, 2008. He was inside his home with his beloved dog Baby when his house burnt to the ground.

PEOPLE BOOTS

Our new PEOPLE BOOTS:

Madeline, at the age of 3, was putzing around minding her own schedule. Definitely, she was not listening to my pleading voice.

"Come on, hurry up! Hurry up! get your barn boots on, and lets go" I kept telling her. No matter what I said or how I said it, she continued to be in her own world.

"Madeline! Get your barn boots on and come on!...blah blah blah... Are you hearing your mother? lets go!"

"Mom!" she finally said.

"What?!"

"They are not barn boots."

"Then what are they?"

"They are people boots!"

And we still call them people boots. People boots are the best all around shoe in our house. They go on easy, come off easy, and are easy to clean. Madeline gets a new pair every year and this year they happened to have my size on sale too!

MOMMA SLEEPS WITH A GUN UNDER THE PILLOW

I think my perception of fear may fall under the catagory of bi-polar. Sometimes I am scared, sometimes I am not and most of the time the fazes lean toward the extreme.

As most of you already know, Andy has been out of town for a couple weeks while he is learning to drive a truck. Yeah it suprises me too. Anyway, it is one of those things he thinks will be stable for him until I finish school. And, I can't fault him for thinking that way. He really does a great job at being head of household even when it means being on the road for awhile.

With Andy being gone, I have been in paranoia mode. It's not like I should be scared to be alone. Shoot, I did it for 3 years before he moved here to NY. Why all the sudden? It is bad though. I can't fall asleep at night so, I have to stay up real late trying to get as tired as I can. Just before bed, I boobie trap the stairs, and block my bedroom door, and sleep with the phone under my pillow with a flash light. I do such a good job at boobie trapping the stairs, no burglar stands a chance! ha.

Anyway, last week I absentmindedly, mentioned to a neighbor that Andy was out of town. Opps! I'm already scared enough, now the neighbors know. I tried to recover by telling them that before Andy left he was given strick instructions on not comming home without making sure I know. If he suprises me, I.m likely to shoot him.

The neighbors gave me look that said "Hey, I believe you, and I will spread the news". Now, at least if there is a rumor about me being home alone, it goes with the fact that I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

MY MOTHER IS SO SMART

People often wonder how my mom was able to manage having so many kids, so close in age (9 years: oldest to youngest). In fact, some people might even think she was a bit crazy. I personally remember asking her the same question too. You know what she told me?
It was easy. You only cost $300.00 a piece.
Not exactly what I was wondering mom! I meant... Didn't we drive you crazy?



She says that from the time she was a little girl, she always wanted a bunch of kids. Not sure if she knew just how many or not, but from what I understand, the reason there are 6 is because she wanted each of us to grow up with a friend. If she stopped at me, I would have been lonely, so she had Lori. Then, came Francie. If she had stopped with her, Francie would be lonely and we wouldn't have Natalie.



You see, I'm kind of in a bind here as I only have one. Madeline, being an only child, dosen't have a built in friend, and for that, I am... CRAZY (or getting closer and closer every day). Siblings just know the boundries and usually work things out without too many battle wounds. Unfortunately, Madeline will never understand the bond of sisters or brothers (that she is close in age with).

I am so glad I am a product of such a smart woman. Maybe if Rachael hadn't taken so many of the 'smart' genes, I would have known better and had two. HA

I suppose I should be greatful for the next best option though. At least we only live 3 miles from my brother who has 4 children. Madeline loves her cousins and she is really close with them. It just dosen't help me when Madeline is at home and complains about being bored.

Disclosure notice: This post is not to be about me wanting more kids. It is me, venting about a very frustrating weekend of dealing with a bored, only-child. UGGH! Why? Oh, why?